Pagi raya,tika saat umat Islam bergembira, sahabatku menderita. Maaf kerna diri ini terlambat mengetahui tentang deritamu ini. Derita yang tidak kau duga di saat bahagia yang kau nantikan.
Dari awal dirimu disahkan hamil, kau telahpun memasang angan2 seperti bakal ibu yang lain. Pengalaman yang kau tempuhi dari saat-saat awal kehamilan hingga kandunganmu berusia 8 bulan, benar2 membahagiakanmu. Itu jelas dari coretanmu di dalam facebook tentang kelasakan anak itu di dalam rahimmu.
Sahabatku, terperanjat benar membaca coretan terakhirmu. Anak itu telah pergi! Pergi mengadap pencipta-Nya yang maha Agung. Terdiam aku memikirkan keadaanmu begini. Tidak pernah aku menduga ada sahabatku yang akan mengalami nasib yang sama denganku satu masa dulu.
Sahabat, beban yang kau tanggung hanya dapat difahami oleh orang-orang yang senasib denganmu. Orang lain hanya mampu berkongsi seketika, namun lama-kelamaan mereka lupa derita kita. Bila tiba saat itu, kau hanya mampu tersenyum tawar saat mereka bercerita tentang keletah dan kerenah anak-anak mereka.. dan hiba di hati tak siapa yang tahu. Mereka tidak membaca hati kecil kita, dan cuba memahami derita ini.
Sahabat, jangan sesekali kau merasa kandunganmu sia-sia. Itu anugerah tidak ternilai dari Allah. Dia telah memberi nikmat kepadamu - loya, muntah, sakit dan pening.. kemudian sakit segala badan, dan kemudian membesar perutmu. Dan kemudian diberi nikmat ditendang oleh kaki kecilnya, dan kau dilayan sebaik-baiknya oleh suami dan ahli keluarga sepanjang kandunganmu itu. Jangan kau merasa sia-sia segala sakit (nikmat) selama itu, kerana lahirnya sementara.. kerana itu seolah-olah menidakkan takdir-Nya, sedangnya masih ramai wanita di dunia ini yang tidak pernah merasakan nikmat itu.
Sahabat, jika kau mahu menangis, menangislah sepuas hatimu jika itu mampu meredakan perasaanmu ketika ini. Biarkan derita itu berlalu pergi kerana janji Allah sudah pasti. Anak kecil itu bakal menunggumu di pintu Syurga.. dan itulah bahagia yang menantimu di akhir nanti.
Sahabat, izinkan aku kongsikan nota ini, supaya menjadi ingatan kepada sahabat kita yang lain, dan semoga mereka mendoakan kita diberi nikmat untuk memulakan segala-segalanya.. sekali lagi..
19 Sept 2009
1815 : Water bed wife dah pecah. tapi skit. on the way to Dungun.
1908 : arrive home than berbuka puasa. water bed pecah byk. terus pergi hospital dungun after maghrib pray (solat jangan tinggal)
1730 : doktor still checking
2000 : serious case. admitted to HKT.
2200 : Doktor cakap tunggu sampai pg esok. than baru boleh buat decision. Wife still have no pain although water bed dah pecah. Something wrong with this trainee doctor.
1815 : Water bed wife dah pecah. tapi skit. on the way to Dungun.
1908 : arrive home than berbuka puasa. water bed pecah byk. terus pergi hospital dungun after maghrib pray (solat jangan tinggal)
1730 : doktor still checking
2000 : serious case. admitted to HKT.
2200 : Doktor cakap tunggu sampai pg esok. than baru boleh buat decision. Wife still have no pain although water bed dah pecah. Something wrong with this trainee doctor.
September 29 at 10:20am
20 Sept 2009
0330 : Baru balik tido. tido kat my unty house
0930 : datang balik. pergi solat raya jap. Mak guard tak bagi jumpa wife. mangkuk sungguh
1000 : Ayah long and mak long datang. terus mak guard bagi masuk.mentang ayah long and mak long is someone in the goverment. dasar kronolisme sungguh.
1400 : wife masuk labour room. damn. its have been 18 hours. and i cant go in.
1930 : nurse call me into the labour room 2 after come back from maghrib prayer. and start annoying me. what a jerk HKT nurse are. they said i got to wait until 1015 for another medical review. Listening to all what all that newbie doctor and nurse said to their patient make me sicks. you dont need to shout loud in order for someone to listen. luckily they dont dare to shout at my wife.
2230 : got to talk with the newbie doktor. do the surgery. no used to wait. stupid ass. an engineer making a medical decision. my baby heartbeat is normal.
0330 : Baru balik tido. tido kat my unty house
0930 : datang balik. pergi solat raya jap. Mak guard tak bagi jumpa wife. mangkuk sungguh
1000 : Ayah long and mak long datang. terus mak guard bagi masuk.mentang ayah long and mak long is someone in the goverment. dasar kronolisme sungguh.
1400 : wife masuk labour room. damn. its have been 18 hours. and i cant go in.
1930 : nurse call me into the labour room 2 after come back from maghrib prayer. and start annoying me. what a jerk HKT nurse are. they said i got to wait until 1015 for another medical review. Listening to all what all that newbie doctor and nurse said to their patient make me sicks. you dont need to shout loud in order for someone to listen. luckily they dont dare to shout at my wife.
2230 : got to talk with the newbie doktor. do the surgery. no used to wait. stupid ass. an engineer making a medical decision. my baby heartbeat is normal.
September 29 at 10:20am
21 Sept 2009
0011 : my baby is in my arms. he was born on 1111 pm 20.09.2009. how lucky to get all that numbers at once. he is very active. he touch my face during the "azan".
0100 : go to see my baby at level 5. after sending my wife back to her room. takes time due to silly problem. the nurse doesnt believe i'm entitled with 1st class services. aku terlampau selekeh untuk menjadi seorang profesional, they said. the baby got problem. he seem to be drowning. during the sucking process, i can see some quantity of water bed have been suck out. goshhh. he is drowning. not good.
0115 : being sent to level 6. ICU. he seem to be stable there.
0345 : back to my aunt house. need sleep.
0800 : back to the hospital.saw my wife first. she seems ok. have a chat with her.
1200 : go to see my boy. nobody observing him. and all alarm light is on. cari nurse. nurse terkejut. doctors rushing.
0011 : my baby is in my arms. he was born on 1111 pm 20.09.2009. how lucky to get all that numbers at once. he is very active. he touch my face during the "azan".
0100 : go to see my baby at level 5. after sending my wife back to her room. takes time due to silly problem. the nurse doesnt believe i'm entitled with 1st class services. aku terlampau selekeh untuk menjadi seorang profesional, they said. the baby got problem. he seem to be drowning. during the sucking process, i can see some quantity of water bed have been suck out. goshhh. he is drowning. not good.
0115 : being sent to level 6. ICU. he seem to be stable there.
0345 : back to my aunt house. need sleep.
0800 : back to the hospital.saw my wife first. she seems ok. have a chat with her.
1200 : go to see my boy. nobody observing him. and all alarm light is on. cari nurse. nurse terkejut. doctors rushing.
September 29 at 10:21am
1230 : got explanation from Dr Tan Hooi Kheng . he have congenital pneumonia with severe persistent pulmonary hypertension and cardiogenic shock. oh my God. not good. some cases show positive respond. other than that......
1530 : bring my wife to see my boy. She doesnt know anything yet. i dont have the guts to tell her. letting Dr Tan telling all the thing except the percentage of living. the respond seem positive
1530 : bring my wife to see my boy. She doesnt know anything yet. i dont have the guts to tell her. letting Dr Tan telling all the thing except the percentage of living. the respond seem positive
September 29 at 10:22am
1900 : got a call from Dr Tan. dont like it. bring my wife together. saw 7 tube of medicine, 1 types of hormone, 2 types of gas and also a life support machine. the BP is dropping. i know my baby is gone that time. but not medically proven yet. because his brain is still alive. Dr Sharifah and Dr Tan is trying to calm us. have a few chat with those doctor and also contacting a few specialist that i know. The maximun of waiting hours is just 18 hours. and most cases, you dont need to wait. still considering the option to sue HKT. have a little chat with my lawyer.
2030 : Adzin Kamil officially been call to meet his creater, Allah. done all the procedure to bring Adzin back by myself. everyone is on the way to Kay Tee.
0030 : Dikebumikan di atas pusara his great-great grandmaa. its raining. quiet heavy but i'm still not that wet.
2030 : Adzin Kamil officially been call to meet his creater, Allah. done all the procedure to bring Adzin back by myself. everyone is on the way to Kay Tee.
0030 : Dikebumikan di atas pusara his great-great grandmaa. its raining. quiet heavy but i'm still not that wet.
September 29 at 10:22am
Sahabat, suamiku pernah berkata, Selagi tidak lahir anak itu, belum pasti dia milik kita. Jika dia selamat dilahirkan, juga buka milik kita yang mutlak melainkan Allah semata-mata. Bersabarlah sahabat dan berdoalah. Pasti bahagia yang dinanti akan menjelma jua.
Salam sayang..
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